Yep. Slow, slow, slow

So I guess given my failure to write anything profound in the past month, I'll settle instead for providing the funniest thing I've read in quite a while.

By George Callas, Phoenix, AZ (Reprint from _Jitterbug_; Vol. 4, Issue 2, April 1995)

THE TOP TEN SIGNS YOU DIDN'T DO AS WELL AS YOU THOUGHT IN THE LAST JACK AND JILL

10. The shoe lady discontinues the style of shoe you dance in.
9. The person who promised to compete with you is standing on a nearby freeway playing chicken with the semi's.
8. The very worst dancer in the world says you were the only contestant on the beat.
7. The maintenance crew has to repair the floor where you danced.
6. Your partner's spouse gives you a hug and kisses you on both cheeks.
5. Forty minutes have passed and your partner still hasn't come out of the bathroom.
4. You wonder if the noise coming from the judges' area is snoring.
3. After you dance, people point and laugh at whoever is standing behind you; BUT, when you turn around, there's no one there.
2. You would have preferred dancing to "Baby Work Out" and then learned that you did.

And the number one reason:
1. Pieces of your partner's dress are still in your hand.